The Little Door We Each Have Inside Us.
It is my belief that we each have this door within us and behind which is an incredible ocean of potential and beauty and force and love.
You might be asking, Well, why is there a door there?
You might refer to it as a mask or something else.
It's always been my belief that we--and yes, I'm speaking about myself, too--use that door to hide behind.
We use that door as protection.
Sometimes we allow it to swing open, but just a bit, or for just a certain amount of time.
And then we allow it to swing shut again.
We're safe.
We use that door to prevent others from seeing who we truly are: our gifts, our weaknesses, our struggles as well as our strengths.
I know I've spent a lot of time trying to work through this and frustrated at my own inability to simply be myself.
For example I spent a lot of time feeling as though I couldn't give myself entirely to my art because, well, because maybe it wouldn't be accepted, or because I knew that my father wouldn't approve of it or value it, and on and on and on.
Case in point:
I finished high school.
Went to one year at what was then Philadelphia College of Art.
Dropped out to play music for several years.
Then began writing fiction for several years.
After 18 years went back to school to do the prerequisites to get into medical school. (during which people would say to me, "Guy, don't take this the wrong way, but have you ever thought of being a therapist? You'd be really good.")
That didn't work out (thankfully!) and so I pivoted and applied to get my doctorate in clinical psychology knowing I wanted to focus on studying trauma.
After I graduated I worked at a clinic in California for 5 years.
Then I decided I needed to start a podcast (as well as create a business) to help inspire new trauma therapists and raise the awareness of trauma.
My point in sharing this is that I never thought I'd be hosting a podcast, and now about to launch a second one!
I never imagined that my path would be this circuitous.
But I want to say this: my path has allowed me and now empowered me to write what I'm writing now.
And I can honestly say that things are changing for me now in the best of ways.
My door is coming off the hinges.
I love my ocean of potential and possibilities.
I'm no longer content with having my ocean hide or reside behind a door.