I’m Scared. Wait! Did I Just Say That?!
I'm scared. Wait! Did I just say that?
Going through what I'm going through now I'm finding that there's a lot of stuff coming up.
Anxiety--I'm used to dealing with that. It sucks but I can manage.
Frustration--same.
Sadness--Nope. I have a very hard time dealing with it. I don't want to face it. I find that I'm doing a lot to avoid it.
I'm creating projects around situations that are very sad in order to avoid feeling the emotion. This is taking up a lot of mental energy and as a result I can avoid the feeling.
It’s also making wonder why I’m avoiding it.
I don’t want to feel weak.
I don’t want to look weak in front of other people. In front of my kids.
Fear. Another one. Again nope. I’m not as good at dealing with this one.
I think I’m learning though through this process that I have to allow these emotions to come. All of them.
I have to allow them to come.
I must allow them to be.
And I then need to learn to work with them and whatever comes up.
This means that I’m going to have to take a hard look at…what I’m avoiding.
Otherwise, what?
Otherwise I’m spending a lot of time and energy avoiding things.
Otherwise it feels as though it’s holding this power over me.
Or I’m allowing it to do so.
Feel it. Work through it.
Yes, it sucks, but move through it.
Okay, deep breath.
Let's each of us stay strong.